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Showing posts with the label wife

That is all the validation you need

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How unsurprising...

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Just be glad she hasn't left you

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Translation: Husband: "What's up with you? I'm a man and your husband! Won't you give me any respect?" Wife: "When the village panchayat had my head shaved infront of the village last year for cutting our maid's braid, you instead of stopping them had a boner in your lungi and picked up my shaved hair. You call yourself a man and a husband? You ate like a pig, now go and sleep. Once I finish my chores I will come and sleep with you."  
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It's okay. You can enjoy him later in the night.

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Translation: MIL: "Hey girl, where are you? Your husband's headshave is almost done there. How long will you take to mix and bring the sandalwood paste?" Fetishist Wife: Inner Voice: "This old hag is so irritating. I thought of having my hubby's head shaved by supervising it close but she sent me into kitchen to mix sandalwood paste. Now I'm trying to rub my p**** watching his headshave through the window and she's not letting me do even that peacefully!" Outer Voice: "I'm bringing it aunty!"  
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She is making a really good point

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Translation: "Honey, plz think again about our summer headshave.. What do we even stand to gain by having this stupid hair anyway?"  
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Too much respect

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Doesn't hurt to try though

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Translation: "My MIL wants to get my head shaved cause some fake baba told her that I'd get pregnant if I have my hair removed. As long as her son is impotent what would you get by having my head shaved except for my hair!"
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Oh my (Pattern) Baldie..

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Ideal MIL and DIL

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Translation: "Ah hello attamma (MIL)! It's me, nothing much.. We are going to offer our hair tomorrow right, see the pics of sarees I sent you on whatsapp and tell which one would suit me after my headshave!"
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Newly weds I guess

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Translation: "Honey, when you return get a 'helmet' too along with the hat..!"
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Made for each other

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Her husband is sweaty. Can't blame her.

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Translation: "Could you also wash that razor while changing the blade please? I mean you shaved my hubby's armpits with that at the end of his headshave so.."
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But the face says it all, honey.

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Wife seeing hubby after headshave; "If I tell him that he looks sexy with that shaved head, he will get too cocky. I better pretend like he looks just average."  
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Whining only makes it worse

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Translation: Wife: "I'm already losing a lot of hair, what would be left of it if I offer 3 fistfuls of my braid?" Husband: "Since you're losing a lot of hair anyway you better get all of it shaved then!"
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Wife's heads up

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"Honey, I'm warning you! I look too sexy with a shaved head. When they shave my head tomorrow, hope you don't have a boner and embarrass yourself in front of MIL and everyone. You better wear an extra set of underwear just to be safe!"
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When wifey fulfills your desire

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Translation: 1. "Here honey. You have been waiting for so long to get my head shaved, right? Give this blade and token to the barber with your hands!" 2. "Haha, looks like my hubby wants my head shaved really smooth. He's giving a 200 rupees note as tip to the barber in advance along with my blade and token!"
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No honey, you'd look so cute.

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Translation: "Please dear. I will get on a diet and lose my weight first and then shave my head. If I get my head shaved now with this physique, I will look like a bald boulder."
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Clever solution

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Translation: "Why are you saying no to my headshave, honey? Your problem is that you won't have anything for grip while we do 'it' at nights, isn't it? In that case I will leave a tuft of hair at the back, you can use it for grip!"
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My wife's fate

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Translation: Mom: "Why are you wasting time taking pics of me right before my headshave sweetie? Your Dad will come in shouting at us for delaying at any moment, you know about his obsession with headshave.." Daughter: "Yes mom, I do. That is why I very well know that dad will definitely keep your head regularly reshaved for atleast 3 or 4 months. I don't know when I will see you with long hair again."
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Wife's warning

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(Translation: "There there! Don't you back off now! You told me that you would get my head shaved. Now if you tell me to go for 3 scisscors, I'll forget that you're my husband and kick you on your a**, I'm telling you!")
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When customs favour your headshave (With English Translation)

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Father in law: "So, you're giving your hair too, right dear?" Mother in Law: "Of course she will.. our family has a custom of getting the mother's head shaved too when we have a male child after all.." Her: "You're right Attayya (MIL).. But your son told me that I may not look good with total bald look and ask me to refrain from headshave..!" Mother in Law: "Let him cry, dear. You will look so good with gundu. I'll talk some sense into him, you just get your head shaved smoothly, the hair will grow back thicker too." Her: "Okay Attaya, I'll get my head shaved as you say."  
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